Taming the Bathing Suit Beast

Here are a few handy tips to consider while purchasing your swimwear this year. I apologize for the sound, this is very low tech, and it was windy! I did add the approximate text below the video.

Thanks to JANE for suggesting I talk about this dilemma, and congratulations to her for winning my first $50 gift certificate giveaway from my jewelry website!!!

To be considered for a gift certificate, please leave ideas in the comments section of this blog, and subscribe to the blog where it says email subscription. (or email them at sueanneshirzay3@gmail.com) If I select the topic  you are eligible to win a gift certificate. I will give out AT LEAST one per month. Good luck and happy shopping!!!

Here is the text, most of which is covered in the video:

Guess what, Girls? Spring break is almost here, and after that comes SUMMER. Time to do what strikes FEAR and TERROR into the hearts of women everywhere. That’s right….BUYING AND WEARING A BATHING SUIT.

Taming the Bathing Suit Beast. TOP Tips to consider while buying SWIMWEAR

Try to avoid ordering bathing suits from a catalog. They don’t even look good on the model, how are they going to look good on you? Go somewhere where someone will actually help you find the best fit, like an actual bathing suit store. Yes, at first the screaming and/or laughing in the fitting room next to you may be a little bit disconcerting, but you do really need to try on 10 suits sometime to get the best fit. And the salespeople are trained to help you.

If you must buy from a catalog buy at least 4 and send back the ones you don’t like. Remember bathing suit sizes generally run a size smaller than clothing so you have to buy one size up from your dress size. Don’t worry. There will be some you don’t like. You won’t keep them all.

Get one that won’t fall apart in the hottub, fall off while you are surfing, swimming or running, or ploomph up while you are trying to swim. I have some of those ploompy skirts. And…Is there anything more embarrassing that asking somebody to FIND and GIVE YOU your bathing suit bottom back.  I DON’T THINK SO!!

Don’t wear a girdle bathing suit, they are for insecure people .

What ever fat you are trying to hide will just ploomph up at your neck or down to your thighs, so it’s just not a good idea. You won’t be able to breath. I like breathing. Breathing is FUN. “Just Breathe”

Dont think you need to look like a swimsuit model

You are not being PAID to look fantastic in a swimsuit, are you?  They are. They have airbrushing and they are 20 years old. Get over it. you look fantastic just as you are.

DO buy one that actually covers the things that are supposed to be covered, unless the things that are supposed to be covered look really good, and then, who CARES? Show them!

BUT… You don’t want some kid on the beach pointing to your chest and screaming “Mommy! Mommy!” Support what needs supporting. If you have a short torso, this needs to be taken into consideration. Balance the top of the suit with the bottom of the suit. Make sure you look at the back in the mirror and make sure you are covering what needs to be covered.

Don’t buy an old lady bathing suit if you are not an old lady. It’s not 1928. the bathing suit is  NOT supposed to go down to your knees. There is NO reason to cover all that up.

Don’t buy a one piece if you could be wearing a bikini.

Don’t buy one with lots of bells and whistles… gold or siver lame, leopard print, lots of jewels and stuff. it just isn’t good. If you see people LAUGHING AT YOU or they say NICE SUIT, alot…that’s how you know you went overboard.

Have fun and see you at the Beach!

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7 Comments on “Taming the Bathing Suit Beast”


  1. hey cupcake you did a great job – OMG Girdle Bathing suits – like I want my legs to resemble sausages??? Too funny – I remember a long time ago I had a friend who we invited to visit us at the beach and before we all took the trip I was joking around about the women who wear the old lady suits with the skirts and what do you think she wore??? OMG I was horrified and so embarassed. I like plain one piece suits in a nice color and something that covers my butt (not high cut) and I don’t worry about looking like a twenty something anymore. Life is too short to worry about how you look in the suit – go out and enjoy the sand and surf! Good job!

    • sueanneshirzay Says:

      Thank you, I just hate it when women assume they have to kill themselves in those girdle suits. Breathing is IMPORTANT, dangit! : )


  2. Hey Gidge,

    Where were Moon Doggie, Frankie, and the freakin’ Polar Bear Club for this segment?

    Thank goodness it wasn’t filmed at the Jersey Shore. Oops, duck, Dub Dee throwing shoes at me.

    Surf’s up, shimmying into my clam diggers, hang ten…dudette.

    –Dawg out.

    • sueanneshirzay Says:

      Yes, thank you for noticing I do suffer for my art. Ha Ha. Sometimes you just gotta film when you have an able body to hold the camera, Dawg!

  3. rachel Says:

    Love that, Sueanne … Now, I dont have too many hang-ups about what I look like in a bathing suit. I’m curvy ,probably quite overweight, but ok with myself. Am I normal 😉 ?? xx
    p.s. I’m English too.
    xx

  4. Michelle Says:

    Very fun! I once spent an entire day at the Mall Of America with a friend looking for a swim suit. She tried on at least 100 of them and didn’t buy any. Never, ever again. The next time she came to shop at the MOA I dropped her off and picked her up! She found a pair of jeans that day! Yeah!


  5. […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by SashaKane, Sueanne Shirzay . Sueanne Shirzay said: From my blog video archives… Taming the Bathing Suit Beast: http://t.co/lGAecVj […]


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