The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Fashionistas

Habit 1 : Look like a snob, but don’t actually be one.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again-effective fashionistas know no labels. Labels are meaningless, as are prices. Learn to de-snob. You will never remember what you paid for something if you really really love it. Conversely, if it cost you fifty cents at the yard sale, who cares?

Bali Blues with Garnet


Even the Mecca of low-end—Target— actually has famous designers go in and do really low price limited edition collections. It’s excellent marketing for the designer as it makes people think they actually love their customers and generally offers great items. Zac Posen, Jean Paul Gaultier, Anya Hindmarch are a few of the designers who have done this. 

Habit 2 : Always know where the endzone is, and don’t run the wrong way on the field

Don’t go into a store to get a pair of shoes and come out with two suits. Where are the shoes? You needed the shoes. The average U.S. Household spends $1800.00 annually on clothes.  The average woman spends three years of her life shopping. Don’t make it six!  In total 90 trips a year are dedicated to keeping up appearances – 30 to shop for clothes, 15 for shoes, 18 for accessories and 27 for bathroom essentials. Know what you want before you start looking for it. Think of those mall trips as search and destroy missions, not time sucks. 

Habit 3: Exercise is important

To be an effective Fashionista, you need to be able to outrun people, specifically women between the ages of 18 and 55. Please lift weights as those biceps come in handy when you have to lift heavy bags. Hand-eye coordination is also great out at the mall. Practice by killing flies with a flyswatter. Or an old copy of Vogue. 

Habit 4: Returning things is an art form of shopping where you actually make money

Many stores introduce new merchandise in 2 week cycles. Keep your receipts on you. Get a price adjustment if you buy something one week at full price and it gets marked down the next. Buy stuff before the sale and take it back 3 days later and get the sale price. 

Never, ever,  return stuff you have worn, that is oh-so-tacky and is a fashionista NO NO.

Everybody makes shopping mistakes. Fashionistas know when to return something that just doesn’t look good once it gets home. 

Habit 5: Understand that Fashion Magazines and catalogs are either the work of the devil, or a capitalist plot to overthrow your bank account.

Only spend what you can afford. Every effective Fashionista knows that just because you want it doesn’t mean you need it. You know, like Antonio Banderas. Same thing. Only with shoes

Habit 6:  Realize that out of body experiences are for amateurs.

Never base a buying decision on emotion. Nothing will get you into trouble faster than developing emotional attachments to things.  People count. Things don’t. Unless it’s a Tod’s bag at 50% off. 

Habit 7: Bring enough candy for the entire class

When you go out shopping if you have good coupons, always give your extra one to the person behind you. Especially if it’s a long line. You will get to Fashionista heaven more quickly like this.

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4 Comments on “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Fashionistas”

  1. jacqui chew Says:

    Hilarious! But so much truth.

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  3. Jacqui Chew Says:

    Very cute and so very true. I particularly love #1. It’s amazing how a $34 dress can look fabulous when paired with the right shoes and accessories. I was particularly tickled when the $28.90 sequined cardigan from Forever XX1 got rave reviews amidst a Gucci-wearing crowd last holiday season.

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